Wednesday, November 11, 2009

Moving Day

When I moved back to New York from Los Angeles in 2007, I decided to drive my car east. It was my boyfriend at the time's idea, so we could drive to see his family in Queens and drive to see my relatives in Northern Massachusetts. Well, we broke up two years ago, but I've still held onto that car. I'd like to get rid of it, but until then, I'll use it for the powers of good including: Target, the beach, visiting relatives and helping friends move.
A few weeks ago, I drove into the Lower East Side to help a friend move to Williamsburg, Brooklyn. I hate driving in Manhattan. As a pretty nervous person to begin with, it really stresses me out. But, my friend promised me a burger and sweet potato fries, so I overcame.
The friend I helped move was someone I used to work with at my first job out of college. I love her because she has this amazing life outside of work, which seems to be rare in the corporate world. This "amazing life outside of work" includes writing musicals, painting and even reviewing sex toys for a Web site.
When I got to her apartment, I amazingly found a parking space and went upstairs to help her grab some stuff. I went for this large black Tupperware because I figured I could pile stuff on top and minimize the number of trips. As soon as I grabbed it, she said, "Careful, that's filled with sex toys." I'm not entirely prude, but I do get teased quite a bit for not wanting to talk about sex very much. It was a little awkward.
It got even more awkward when I grabbed some steel bars and heard, "Oh, that's my sex swing." Even more awkward still, when grabbing a pole with the top half covered in a black trash bag and feeling something squishy at the covered end. What could that be? A pogo dick.
That sent me a little over the edge because I had been trying to manipulate the "object" to get it to fit into my car. I didn't realize the object was a rubber penis.
I don't know if I'll ever have a more unique moving experience, or a more delicious burger that I know I earned.

2 comments:

Maggie said...

Yay, a new post! It has been forever! I have missed your amazing stories!

Also, I wish I had a sex swing, you know, just to make people uncomfortable when they help me move! And for no other purpose (wink, wink)!

josh said...

I very rarely ask friends to move my box of sex toys. Very rarely.