Party Tips

Tomorrow is my 28th birthday. I’m going to a local BBQ place for copious amounts of beer and smoked items. And, while I don’t have a Twitter, I do read some “celebrities’” feeds. One of the best is Andrew WK’s feed. He likes to post party tips, and I hope to have a chance to use one of his most recent ones tomorrow night: PARTY TIP: 1) Get down on your stomach. 2) Put a magazine on your head. 3) Quickly say the word "butterball" over and over.
It may happen.
Lately, I’ve had this streak of being REALLY bold – well, bold by my standards. I’m not sure if it’s heat stroke, or I just don’t CARE what anyone thinks of me because I’m awesome or I’m “coming into my own” (ew) – it doesn’t matter, but it’s all happening.

Also, happiest of happy birthdays TODAY to my beautiful friend Lillie.

Happy Birthday, Maggie!

Anyone who reads this may have noticed a few links to the right of here. You see them? Well, click on the one that says Keegan Gross Family. Or, hey, just click here.
Today is Mama Keegan Gross' birthday. I've know Maggie since 8th grade, when I wore khaki overalls and white Keds and she wore mostly black. In fact, I think I lovingly (?) signed her yearbook asking her if she started her witch clan yet.
Maggie is a smart, beautiful and funny girl who always has perfect hair. She's also married to my brother's best friend, Josh. In high school, Josh would yell to me on campus, "Brian's Little Sister!" He may or may not know my real name. They're a lot of fun, and also parents to the cutest child alive in the history of cutest children.
Here's proof:

(I have friends who (from a safe distance) are obsessed with this baby, never having met said child. You know who you are.)

So, Happy Birthday Maggie! I hope you have a relaxing day, and take some time away from studying for the bar exam to enjoy your wonderful family and your special day!

Happy Birthday Mama Bear!

Today is my mom's 54th birthday. She's had a rough few years, but I hope everything gets better for her. Moms are a special kind of frustrating sometimes, but here a few reasons why my mom is incredible:

- She never holds back on telling me how she feels, which I've realized is incredibly rare
- Every time I go home for a visit, I can count on her to squeal with glee and give one of the best hugs I've ever gotten
- If I need someone to get excited with or for me, I can always count on her
- She always tells me I'm pretty, even though she HAS to, I get the feeling she wants to
- We moved seven times when I was a kid, and ever the nerd-breeder, one of our first stops would be the library to get cards in our new zip code
- When I was living in Los Angeles two years ago, she covered the bathroom mirror with words of encouragement for my first day of work
- She still talks to me even though I was an awful, moody teen
- When I was in college she used to send care packages to all of my roommates and me "just because"
- She bought me The Newlyweds DVDs for Christmas one year and gave them to me in a brown paper bag because she knew I was embarrassed over my love for Nick Lachey
- I know she's had an incredibly difficult life, but most of the time you wouldn't know it
-To this day when I say "I'm just tired" she knows there's more to it and won't give up until I spill the beans
- She tried to grow pot in our backyard

And even though she doesn't read this, I wanted all four of you who do to know why I love my mama.

Keeping tradition alive

It wouldn't be my birthday if I wasn't sick. On the eve of my 26th birthday, my eyes are starting to close because of my "Nighttime" high (CVS' answer to NyQuil), I keep clearing my throat every few minutes and I'm consuming an insane amount of honey lemon cough drops.

Here is a small list of medical ailments/unfortunate events that have happened on or around my birthday over the years:
- The aforementioned fainting on a subway platform/relationship break-up/grandfather passing
- On my eighth birthday, I set up our MINI-trampoline right next to the swimming pool in our backyard so I could jump up higher and right into the pool. I attempted the jump and my feet got stuck under the cloth covering the springs. My body went up and got yanked down with my knees hitting the pavement full force.
- I wanted to see the latest Woody Allen movie on my birthday, when my mother discovered - as we walked towards the theater - what she thought were SCABIES on my arm. She thought I could have picked them up at the retirement home where I was a waitress. I spent the rest of the day with the doctor. (in retrospect this was a good thing as Curse of the Jade Scorpion was TERRIBLE)
- I had lice. I still went to my birthday party, but endured the most violent and rigorous of RID treatments before and after. My friends commented on how shiny and beautiful my hair was; they had no clue I'd been raked over for the past week.
- My mother scheduled a dentist appointment on my birthday (at least it wasn't a lady doctor appointment - she liked to book those on Christmas Eve)

There are more honorable mentions, but it's certainly a proud tradition. In fact, one year my sister got very ill on her birthday and said, "But, [my sister] is the one who's supposed to have the terrible birthdays!"

Despite being sick, I'm planning on making the best of it tomorrow. I'm driving back to New York after a very relaxing weekend in Northern Massachusetts (I can actually hear frogs outside right now). Then I'm going out for Mexican food with some of my favorite people.

p.s. Happy Birthday Brooklyn Sea Hag!